Being Uniquely You

Authentic charisma is not about becoming someone else; it is about learning how God already wired you to connect and then leaning into that design on purpose.

The three charisma styles

McCall Jones teaches that there are three broad charisma styles that shape how we influence others: Entertainment, Compassion, and Authority.

Entertainment style is how you naturally get people to pay attention—through humor, energy, storytelling, or distinctive quirks.

Compassion style is how you help people trust you and feel safe sharing real struggles.

Authority style is how you move people to take action, using clear frameworks, conviction, and direction.

None of these is "better." The power comes from using the style that actually matches who you are rather than copying someone else's persona.

Ben Kjar's hero story

Ben Kjar's life is a vivid example of authentic charisma. Born with Crouzon syndrome, a rare craniofacial condition that required multiple surgeries, he faced bullying and deep limiting beliefs about his future. As a teenager, everything shifted when his mother told him, "You're born different to make a difference," reframing his pain as a calling, not a curse. He stopped hiding, embraced who he was, and became a three-time Utah high school state wrestling champion and Utah Valley University's first NCAA Division I All-American, eventually wrestling for Team USA and winning a world championship.

Ben did not overcome by pretending to be someone else; he overcame by accepting who he was, scars and all, and letting God use that story to lift others.

Being the best version of you

The invitation is simple: stop auditioning for other people's roles and start embracing the assignment God actually gave you.

If you are naturally entertaining, steward your joy and energy to bring hope.

If you are naturally compassionate, trust that your listening and empathy are powerful.

If you are naturally authoritative, use your clarity with humility and love.

You are the only person in history who can be the you that God created; you really are the best in the world at being you.

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them." Ephesians 2:10.