In one person’s world, you’d confidently approach people, saying hello without hesitation. In another’s, you’d hang back near the wall, sticking to familiar faces at a social gathering. Each of us navigates life through our own unique reality, seeing the world through the lens of our experiences. But whether we think our world is sunny or stormy, sometimes we need to step outside it and see things from another angle to truly understand someone else.

Picture three people standing in a line: Persons 1 and 2 face East, while Person 3 faces West, directly opposite Person 2. If Person 2 hands a $100 bill to Person 3, Person 1 won’t see the exchange because they’re positioned behind Person 2. For Person 1 to see it, they’d need to shift to the left or right—changing their perspective.

Now imagine Persons 1 and 3 are in a relationship. If you’re Person 1, trying to understand Person 3 better, you might need to adjust your viewpoint to see things from their side. Or maybe you’re Person 2, wishing others would see life through your eyes. Perhaps, you just need to turn around and listen.

Perspective is everything. It’s your move.

Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others. – Philippians 2:4

In 2005, I met a beautiful woman—now my wife—and let’s just say our relationship had more fireworks than the Fourth of July. In hindsight, some of those early disagreements might have been red flags, but she completely captivated me. She was, and still is, a rare find. Like a treasure chest, she has revealed even more gems over our 16-plus years of marriage.

Truth be told, I was on a mission to get married. Like many, I imagined myself being the husband who makes his wife happy while simultaneously building an empire. You know, easy stuff. But, as it turns out, “happily ever after” is more like “happily, with occasional conflict after.” Take one evening years ago: after a long, exhausting day, all I wanted was to come home and collapse. Instead, I found myself in the middle of yet another disagreement.

The morning before that argument, I thought I’d offer a nice gesture to show my appreciation for her—I brought her flowers. Simple, right? Well, not so fast. Her response? She asked if the store had a return policy because the flowers didn’t match the dining room décor. Apparently, the bouquet’s green, yellow, and red clashed with our dining room’s green theme. Who knew?

Then on another day, a Saturday, I was eager to get us to a land sale at a lakeview development—a two-hour drive away. But we left later than I intended and by the time we arrived, all the prime plots were gone, leaving us with the leftovers. On the drive to church the next day, Sunday, I sat in silence, wondering if I was losing more than just time—it seemed like my health, money, and investment opportunities were taking a hit, too. Not to mention, my dreams of future heirs felt a bit shaky.

Then, it hit me—maybe all of this wasn’t meant to destroy me but to grow me. Perhaps marriage is less about bliss and more about refinement (and figuring out how to navigate floral arrangements). The truth is, playing the victim wasn’t helping either of us. If she wasn’t following my lead, maybe I wasn’t leading well. Marriage, as I’ve learned, isn’t just about happiness or wealth—it’s God’s way of shaping us into better versions of ourselves.

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her” (Ephesians 5:25, CSB).

In life and business, much like in a hospital, we must learn the art of triage. When patients enter the ER with various injuries—whether from accidents, burns, or wounds—the medical team doesn’t rush in treating the first person they see. They evaluate, assess, and determine the most life-threatening conditions to treat first. Without this process, chaos ensues and lives are at risk.

Similarly, in our daily lives and work, we face countless “injuries” in the form of distractions, opportunities, and challenges. But are we applying triage? Often, we throw our energy into tasks or ventures that may not truly promote the health of our life or business. We become preoccupied with things that aren’t threatening the survival or growth of what matters most.

Just like a doctor prioritizes treatment, we must develop the awareness to see what’s truly critical for our success and well-being. Are we addressing the broken bones—those crucial tasks and goals that will keep us moving forward? Or are we bandaging scratches that pose no real threat but consume our time?

With awareness, courage, and persistence, we can improve our decision-making, focusing on what will stabilize and propel us. It’s about dedicating ourselves to life-saving actions in our goals and businesses, ensuring that we don’t get sidetracked by less important distractions.

“Teach us to number our days carefully so that we may develop wisdom in our hearts.” —Psalm 90:12 (CSB)